After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home.
As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?"
"Yes," the golfer responded.
"Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?"
"Yes, I did.
How did you know?" he asked.
"Well," said the policeman very seriously, "Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver's windshield.
The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck.
The fire truck couldn't make it to the fire, and the building burned down.
So, what are you going to do about it?"
The golfer thought it over carefully and responded...
"I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right thumb."
"Yo momma so fat when she steps on a weighing machine, it read ‘one at a time, please'!"
Yo momma’s so fat, her ass has its own congressman.
How did the blonde die drinking milk?
The cow fell on her.
I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn.
Now I’ve got an overwhelming desire to charge at Land Rovers.
Facebook is like a fridge.
Every a few minutes you keep opening and closing it to see if there's anything good in it.
Why did the blonde have a sore belly button?
Because there are blonde men too!
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
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Q: What was the last thing her husband said to her?
A: I'll feed the dog, you feed the fish.
God created universe, Chuck Norris created God.
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