When you sneeze, it means someone is thinking badly of you.
When you have a seizure and pass out, it means Chuck Norris is thinking badly
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Yo' Mama is so stupid, it took her an hour to cook instant rice.
Chuck Norris never swam.
Every time he was about to get in a pool the water ran away in terror!
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Chuck Norris doesn't take the cake, the cake sees Chuck Norris and begs to be devoured.
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How do you know when there's a rabbit in your bed?
You can smell the carrots on his breath.
What did the mother vampire say to her daughter when she picked up a tampon?
"Honey, no in-between meal snacks!"
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Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
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Facebook is like a fridge.
Every a few minutes you keep opening and closing it to see if there's anything good in it.
Why did the blonde have a sore belly button?
Because there are blonde men too!
I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn.
Now I’ve got an overwhelming desire to charge at Land Rovers.