Best jokes ever

A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar. They talk, they connect, and they end up leaving together. They get back to her place, and as she shows him around, he notices that her bedroom is completely packed with teddy bears. Hundreds of small bears are on a shelf all the way along the floor, medium sized ones are on a shelf a little higher, and huge bears are on the top shelf along the wall. The man is kind of surprised by the collection, especially because it’s so extensive, but he decides not to mention this to her. She turns to him…they kiss…then they rip each other’s clothes off and romp around the room all night. After an intense night of passion, as they are lying there together in the afterglow, the man rolls over and asks, smiling, “Well, how’d I do?” The woman says, “You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.”
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: women
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit? The bucket.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing – and then they marry him.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: marriage
Always talk to your wife when you’re making love – assuming there’s a phone handy.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: marriage
A burglar breaks into a house and is quietly and expertly collecting valuables in his bag when he hears a voice: "Jesus is watching you."
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: men
What did Obi Wan say when Luke was constipated? "Use the F-O-R-C-E Luke!"
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Q: Why does a dog lick himself? A: He can't make a fist.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: What do you call a Shih-Tzu mixed with a poodle? A: A Shih-Tzpoo.
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
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