Q: What does a nosey pepper do?
A: Gets jalapeno business!
Q: What happens when a black girl gets pregnant?
A: Her nigga runs away.
Vote:
What do you call a smiling black man?
Snigger
Vote:
What happened to the blond ice hockey team? They drown at spring training.
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her.
She jumped up and slapped him silly.
He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry.
I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."
"Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable assh*le!" she screamed.
"Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."
So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says ''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds''.
I said, ''Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck'
I thought I told you to lose weight.
Says the coach.
What happened to your three week diet that I told you to keep?
Well, I finished it in three days!
A teacher walks into her classroom and turns to the children and says, Today kids im going to ask you what job your daddy has!
She turns to the first child and says, What job dose your daddy have tina??
She replies; he is a carpenter miss.
The teacher turns to the next child and repeats the question...the child says he is the head of a multi-organic food chain.
Very good indeed says miss..........she turns to the next child and says.
What job does your daddy have Robert??
He replies... He's a male prostitute miss; and demands 50 quid.
No,No,No your lying to me Robert i can tell!
Ok then miss you got me i confess.........................................
HE PLAYS RUGBY FOR ENGLAND BUT IM TO ASHAMED TO SAY!!!
What do you call a dinosaur that's a noisy sleeper?
A Brontosnorus.