Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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has 30.14 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, masturbation
A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs. "No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car
An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" "Ach," says the Irish man, "it's drivin' me nuts!"
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender
How can you tell when a man is well hung? When you can just barely slip your finger between his neck and the noose.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: men
I’ve invented a human computer. When he does a mistake he blames another computer.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT
A famous boxer must be operated by appendicitis. From the operation room the doctor gets out holding himself to the walls with a bruised eye and says: A can’t do this anymore! I try to anesthetize him, I count until 9 and he gets up and starts punching me...
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: doctor, sport
When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: ''I love the simple things in life, but I don't want one of them for my husband''.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: marriage
Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, women
Why do doctors slap babies' butts right after they're born? To knock the penises off the smart ones.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: doctor, men
Chuck Norris has a Roundhouse Kick button on his Facebook page, and when he deletes a friend they actually die.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, Facebook
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