Best jokes ever

Two men were sitting at the top floor of the Empire State Building. One man says to the other.. "You know, if you jump out the window here, the force of the wind will blow you back in through the window on the 90th floor.." The other man says "fuck off, you're jokin aren't u?" The 1st man says "No, here.. I'll prove it" so he stands on the window ledge and jumps out.. and comes back in thru the 90th floor window.. The 2nd man says.. "That was just a one off" So he does it again.. and comes thru on the 90th floor.. runs back up and says "See, im telling the truth" The 2nd man says "Wow, im gonna do it then" he stands on the window ledge, jumps out and falls to his death. The barman says to the first man.. "You know, you're a cunt when you're drunk superman.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, celebrity, drunk
A couple of Yogi Berra's team mates on the Yankees ball club swear that one night the stocky catcher was horrified to see a baby toppling off the roof of a cottage across the way from him. Yogi dashed over and made a miraculous catch - but then force of habit proved too much for him. He straightened up and threw the baby to second base.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: baby, sport
Why God did made the snake before lawyers? To exercise.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, god, lawyer
How come you don’t find stupid brunettes anywhere? Because they all painted themselves blond.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: cop
How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling? She’s got that down-in-the-mouth look.
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has 18.30 % from 4 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why are black people, pirates? A: Because they go nigarrr.
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has 18.24 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: black people, pirate, racist
What’s harder to do than nailing a baby to a tree? Nailing it to a dead puppy.
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has 18.11 % from 136 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What about Where does a General keep his Armys? In his sleevies!
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has 18.10 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: military
(A) You are not Tom Cruise, (B) The guns may stop working at the last moment, (C) The Enemy is 1000 times intelligent than you, (D) Your family might not like the amount of compensation on your behalf (E) Just remember, "the safest way to win over your enemies is by making them your friends!"
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has 18.10 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, family, friendship, men, work
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