Best jokes ever

Q: How do you play Iraqi bingo ? A: B-52...F-16...A-10.
Vote:
has 78.66 % from 135 votes. More jokes about: military
A pregnant woman is about to give birth. The doctor has her on the delivery table, legs up in the stirrups. Suddenly, he sees the top of a head push through. Then the baby pops its head out and says to the doctor, “Are you my dad?”. The doctor says, “No, I am your doctor!”. With that, the baby pops right back inside. “Damn!”, says the doctor. A short while later he sees the head push through again. “Are you my dad?”, asks the baby. “No, I am your doctor.”, he replies. Once again the baby vanishes back into his mother’s womb. The doctor turns to a nurse and says, “Nurse, get that baby’s father in here right away–we may have a situation on our hands!”. Moments later the baby’s father is in the delivery room, and the baby’s head once again pops out. “Are you my dad?”, the baby asks of the father. The father replies, “Yes, little baby, I am your father!” The baby then reaches up and begins poking his father in the forehead with his index finger–”How do you like that?”
Vote:
has 78.65 % from 220 votes. More jokes about: baby, birthday, dirty, doctor, women
Yo mama's so fat, when she leaves the beach everybody shouts "The coast is clear."
Vote:
has 78.65 % from 786 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
If you rate this kickass, then Chuck Norris WILL roundhouse kick Justin Bieber's ass.
Vote:
has 78.64 % from 2169 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, music
After a long night of making love, the guy notices a photo of another man, on the woman’s nightstand by the bed. He begins to worry. "Is this your husband?" he nervously asks. "No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend, then?" he continues. "No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear. "Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured. "No, no, no! You are so hot when you’re jealous!" she answers. "Well, who in the hell is he, then?" he demands. She whispers in his ear: "That’s me before the surgery."
Vote:
has 78.63 % from 726 votes. More jokes about: dad, husband, love, sex
A photographer from a well known national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air. He arrived at the airport and saw a plane warming up near the gate. He jumped in with his bag and shouted, "Let's go!" The pilot swung the little plane into the wind, and within minutes they were in the air. The photographer said, "Fly over the park and make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures." "Why?" asked the pilot. "Because I am a photographer," he responded, "and photographers take photographs." The pilot was silent for a moment; finally, he stammered, "You mean you're not the flight instructor?"
Vote:
has 78.63 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: airplane, stupid, travel, work
Chuck Norris beat Halo 3 on legendary, with a broken Guitar Hero controller.
Vote:
has 78.63 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Like changing coins - I always desired to change my 60 old years wife to three 20 years girls!
Vote:
has 78.63 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: age, life, marriage, money, wife
Baby, baby, baby ooh! Mom: *walks in* Are you listening to Justin Bieber? Daughter: No, I'm watching porn. Mom: Oh, thank goodness.
Vote:
has 78.63 % from 167 votes. More jokes about: life, music, sex
Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
Vote:
has 78.63 % from 225 votes. More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
<<<156157158159
More jokes →
Page 156 of 1427.