Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
Vote: has 78.15 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

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Yo mama is so fat she fell in love and broke it.
Vote: has 78.15 % from 351 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, love, Yo mama
There was this General-in-training, and his superiors were asking him questions “What happened on June 6, 1944?” “We stormed the beach at Normandy, which later became known as D-Day, sir!” “What was the turning point of world war 2?” “Battle of the bulge, sir!” “What’s is the importance of May 12″ The Man thought and thought “I don’t know, sir!” The superior then said “Well, I’ll tell your wife that you forgot her birthday.”
Vote: has 78.15 % from 105 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: birthday, military, war, wife
At a Barrack, the commander calls the captain: "Take as many soldiers you need and start building additional toilets. The number of the people in need has increased!" "I would suggest, sir, instead of building more toilets, maybe we should hire a new cook!"
Vote: has 78.15 % from 105 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military
Why are black people so good at Basketball? Cause all you have to do is RUN, SHOOT and STEAL.
Vote: has 78.14 % from 1454 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, racist, sport
Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
Vote: has 78.14 % from 189 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Vote: has 78.13 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

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A man goes to the doctor for his annual check-up, and the doctor tells him, "You need to stop masturbating." The man asks, "Why?" The doctor replies, "Because I'm trying to examine you"
Vote: has 78.13 % from 440 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
At the court of a small provincial town, a lawyer calls his first witness, an old woman around 80 and he asks her with a professional style: "Do you know me, Mrs. Rowland?" "Of course, I know you Mr. Smith! says the old woman. I know you since you were little, and I have to confess that I am very disappointed in you. You lie, you cheat on your wife repeatedly, you gossip about your clients. Of course, I know you!" Speechless, by the unexpected answer, the lawyer points with his finger on the other side of the court room and says: "Do you know the defense lawyer?" "Oh, yes! I know Mr. Soft as well. I was holding him in my arms when he was a baby, and I can say that I am disappointed in him, too. He’s a drunk and a gamester. He finds it hard to develop a normal relationship with anyone and he is one of the worst lawyers of our town!" At that point, the Chairman interrupts the process and demands from the two lawyers to approach the bench. When they do, he bends over and whispers to them: "If any of you jerks, asks if she knows me, you’re screwed!"
Vote: has 78.12 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, drunk, lawyer, relationship, wife
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
Vote: has 78.11 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, Santa