Q: Why did the little black boy start crying when he had diarrhea?
A: He thought he was melting.
A dog walks into a pub, and takes a seat.
He says to the barman, "Can I have a pint of lager and a packet of crisps please".
The barman says, "Wow, that's amazing! You should join the circus!"
The dog replies, "Why? Do they need electricians?"
Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman pull down his pants?
A: He heard the snow blower coming.
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white.
The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof.
Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof.
Next is the black guy's turn.
The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.
Vote:
A guy asks a Chinese lady for her phone number she says, "Free, sex, free, sex, tonight."
The guy said," wow" and her friend says she means 363629.
Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex:
- You can GET chocolate.
- Chocolate satisfies even when it's gone soft.
- You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.
- You can have chocolate in in public.
- If you bite the nuts, the chocolate won't mind.
- The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate.
- You don't get hairs in your mouth with chocolate.
- No need to fake your enjoyment of chocolate.
- Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.
- You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
- You are never too young or too old for chocolate.
- Size doesn't matter - though more is still better.
Q: What do a gynaecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in common?
A: They can both smell it, but can't eat it.
Knock-knock
Who's there?
Fuck.
Fuck who?
You.
Vote:
I saw a black guy running with a new blu-ray player, and it looked just like mine.
So I called my wife, but it turned out ours was still at home picking cotton.
Vote:
You're riding a horse full speed, there's a giraffe beside you, and you're being chase by a lion.
What do you do?
Get your drunk ass off the carousel.