Best jokes ever

Teacher: "Who knows what is a difference between a snowman and snowwoman?" Little Johnny: "Three snowballs!"
Vote:
has 72.85 % from 155 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, little Johnny, teacher, winter
Father: Son this time, you have to score 90% marks in your exams. Son: No father I'll score 100% marks. Father: Why are you kidding? Son: Who started?
Vote:
has 72.84 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: school
One night my mother in law came to our home. In the middle of the night suddenly I was awakened by a horrible sound from WC. She farted. I was so angry that shouted and said: "Your food is under your feet and your weapons are complete get out and go to fight with ISIS!"
Vote:
has 72.84 % from 619 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, mother in law, terrorist, war
Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
Vote:
has 72.83 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Man to friend: ‘I read a survey that said half the men in the UK masturbate in the shower, and the other half sing. Do you know what they sing?’ Friend: ‘No I don’t.’ Man: ‘I thought you wouldn’t.’
Vote:
has 72.83 % from 368 votes. More jokes about: sex
Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the little girl was up to, he politely asked: "What are you up to there, Nancy?" "My goldfish died", replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned: "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied: "That's because he's inside your fucking cat."
Vote:
has 72.83 % from 208 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, death, fish, little Johnny
Knock Knock! Who's there? Testicules. Testicules who? Pillow for penis .
Vote:
has 72.82 % from 435 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock
( boy 1 ) : you need to say what ever i say in backwards. ( boy 2 ) : okay. ( boy 1 ) : A B C ( boy 2 ) : C B A ( boy 1 ) : 1 2 3 ( boy 2 ) : 3 2 1 ( boy 1 ) : okay lets make this harder : CRACK MY FINGER ( Boy 2 ) : Finger my crack .
Vote:
has 72.82 % from 482 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
Vote:
has 72.81 % from 163 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, geography, gym, health
An Ohio State University mortician student walked into the embalming room where a cadaver was lying on the table. Confident that he knew enough now to begin the procedure without his instructor, he began to examine the body. When he rolled it over, he was shocked to see a cork in the man's butt. Mystified, he pulled it out and immediately heard the University of Michigan fight song come out of the guy's butt. Shaken by what had happened, he quickly shoved the cork back into it's original resting place. He then ran to get his instructor, nervously shouting, "Sir, you must come, you won't believe what I discovered!" Annoyed by the interruption, the professor said, "Let's take a look at this astounding discovery." When they entered the morgue, the teacher was also surprised to see the cork, so he approached the table and promptly removed the cork. Upon hearing the University of Michigan fight song, he quickly replaced the cork in the cadaver's butt and said, "What's so surprising about that? I've heard thousands of assholes sing that song!"
Vote:
has 72.80 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, music, school, student
<<<293294295296
More jokes →
Page 293 of 1426.