Chuck Norris finished the Never Ending Story.
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Chuck Norris didn't sign the Declaration of Idependence because he wanted the British to think they had chance.
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Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
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While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
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The Twilight Zone enters the Chuck Norris Zone.
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When you die on Earth you go to hell.
When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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When Chuck Norris logged in to WoW, everyone logged out.
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When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap.
When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
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Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth.
Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
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