If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
Chuck Norris can make music in Adobe Photoshop.
Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
In some countries, criminals have the option of either going to jail or spending a day living with Chuck Norris. No one has ever chosen Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris invented zombies so that he can kill his victims again.
Chuck Norris was once part of a knock knock joke. The Joke ended abruptly when after the first knock the door blew up killing the man behind it.
Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
Newton's 3rd Law never applies to Chuck Norris.