Best jokes ever

A boy went into a hoare house and said he wanted an AIDS's infected prostitute. The woman at reception said room 9 top of the hall. He went to the room and did his business.When he was leaving she asked him why he wanted her she being aids infected. The boy answered,"When I go home i'll sleep with the babysitter then my dad will sleep with the babysitter then my dad will sleep with my mam then in the morning my mam will fuck the milkman and thats the BASTARD that ran over my dog.
Vote: has 73.11 % from 657 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, business, dad, dog, sex
Little Johnny came home after school: "Daddy, I have a bad grade in English language." "Why?" asked his father. "Well, the teacher asked us the following question: "Mary entered the forest with John and came out of the forest with Mike. What is Mary?" "How come what Mary is? A whore, of course," said the father. "That's what I said, but the teacher answered Mary was a subject."
Vote: has 73.11 % from 144 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, little Johnny, school
In funeral of my friend's wife, I went to condole him so I said: "Don't think she was your wife, she was for all".
Vote: has 73.10 % from 93 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, funeral, insulting, sex, wife
This old man and woman were on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find her so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat it read: "Sir, sorry to inform you, we found your wife dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her very most private part was an oyster and inside it was a pearl worth $50,000 ...please advise." So the old man faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap..."
Vote: has 73.10 % from 169 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, old people, wife
How do you kill 10,000 Mexicans? Throw a peso over a cliff. How do you kill 10,000 more? Tell them nobody got it.
Vote: has 73.09 % from 206 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, mexican, racist
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself
Vote: has 73.08 % from 173 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: little Johnny
What happened to the Asian when he walked into a wall with a boner? He hit his nose.
Vote: has 73.07 % from 439 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: asian, racist
A biologist, a chemist and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5th to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses 5th to the right. The statistician yells "We got 'em!"
Vote: has 73.05 % from 71 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: chemistry, hunting, math, nerd
Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
Vote: has 73.04 % from 355 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: IT, life, programmer, sex
Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The American jumped off and shouted "God save America!" The English man jumped off and shouted "God Save The Queen!" The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted "God save the person who I land on!''
Vote: has 73.04 % from 339 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: god, sport


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