Best jokes ever

Q: What animal has the most kids. A: A sperm whale.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, kids
Chuck Norris once won a Poker tournament using only Pokemon cards.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, game
Q: What's worse than having termites in your piano? A: Crabs on your organ.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
Computer users are divided into three types: novice, intermediate and expert. Novice users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate users: people who don’t know how to fix their computer after they’ve just pressed a key that broke it. Expert users: people who break other people’s computers.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: IT
The psychiatrist asks his patient: "Do you really think that you are a horse?" The patient: "Yes." The Doctor: "Ok, it will be a long and expensive therapy." The patient: "It's ok, I have enough money." Doctor: "And how it is possible?" The patient: "Because I have won three times horse races."
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: doctor, horse, money
A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached down and took a cat out of a box. The cat walked all over the dog and the dog didn't move. "Yes, your dog is dead," says the doctor. "How much do I owe you?" the lady asks. "$345," says the doctor. "$345!!?" the lady asks. "Yes. $45 for the office visit and $300 for the cat scan."
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, doctor, dog, money
If Chuck Norris movies were in 3D, the audience would be dead.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, technology
Yo momma so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
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has 73.44 % from 213 votes. More jokes about: insulting, stupid, Yo mama
An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow were hired at a construction site. The foreman pointed out a huge pile of sand and told the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping." To the Scotsman he said, "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies." He then said, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile." The foreman went away for a of couple hours, and, when he returned, the pile of sand was untouched. He asked the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replied, "I no hava no broom. You said to the Chinese fella that he a wasa in a charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere." Then the foreman turned to the Scotsman and said, "And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile." The Scotsman replied, "Aye, ye did lad, boot ah couldnay get meself a shoovel! Ye left th' Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin' him either." The foreman was really angry by now and stormed off toward the pile of sand to look for the Chinese guy. Just then, the Chinese guy jumped out from behind the pile of sand and yelled... "SUPPLIES!"
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has 73.44 % from 188 votes. More jokes about: life, racist
Jordan: My teacher says I have to write more clearly. Mom: That’s a good idea, Jordan. Jordan: No, it’s not. Then she’ll know I can’t spell.
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has 73.43 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: school
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