Best jokes ever

The racehorse owner was annoyed with the running of his horse at the race. He turned on the jockey. "Flaherty, could you not have raced faster?" "Sure I could have, but you know we are supposed to stay on the horse."
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has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: horse, sport
Yo mama is so fat whenever I want to make sex I would request her to fart in order to find the address of her ass.
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has 71.96 % from 341 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, fat, sex, Yo mama
‘Its been a rough day. I put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom.’ Rodney Dangerfield
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has 71.95 % from 337 votes. More jokes about: sex
An old lady at the bank asked me if I could help her check her balance. So I pushed her over.
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has 71.95 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: old people
Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry." "Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How the heck does that fit in here?" So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter. The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry?'" The old man answers, "Is name of owner." The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?" "Me, is right here," replies the old man. "You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?" "Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?' He say, 'Hans Olaffsen.' Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?' I say, 'Sem Ting.'"
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has 71.94 % from 356 votes. More jokes about: asian, blonde, food, life
Student: What’s infinity? Math Teacher: Think of a number. Student: Okay, I’ve got one. Teacher: Good. That’s not it.
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has 71.91 % from 409 votes. More jokes about: math
Yo Momma is so fat… that when she wore a blue and green sweater,everyone thought she was Planet Earth.
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has 71.90 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: fat, Yo mama
A dog walks into a pub, and takes a seat. He says to the barman, "Can I have a pint of lager and a packet of crisps please". The barman says, "Wow, that's amazing! You should join the circus!" The dog replies, "Why? Do they need electricians?"
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has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: animal, bartender, dog
If the box says: "This software requires Windows XP or better" Does that mean it'LL run on Linux?
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has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: computer, geek, IT, nerd, technology
My granddad always used to say; "As one door closes, another one opens..." Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.
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has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: dad, old people
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