Q: How can you tell when the chief accountant is getting soft? A: When he actually listens to marketing before saying no.
Father's Day always worried James. He was afraid that he will get a gift he can't afford.
Chuck Norris never reads the News – because Chuck Norris IS the News.
Girl: "Why did the king go to the dentist?" Boy: "I don't know, Why?" Girl: "To get a new crown!"
Q: What do you call fake spaghetti? A: "I'm pasta."
If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
Q: What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin? A: Polar Bond.
When raining, Chuck Norris doesn't need an umbrella , he can dodge the rain drops.