Why did the white guy go to the black guy's yard sale?
To get his stuff back.
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I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word "Mother-in-law" you get the words "Woman Hitler".
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Good girls go to bed at 8 p.m., since they need to be home by 11 p.m.
A husband and wife decide they need to spice up their sex life.
The wife buys a pair of crotchless underwear, puts them on, and goes into the bedroom.
She seductively asks her husband,
"Hey Big Boy, do ya want some of this?"
The husband takes one look at her underwear and replies,
"Hell no! Look what that thing does to underwear!"
Q: What's the difference between a black guy and a elevator?
A: The elevator can raise a child.
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The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real.
It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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One day a rather inebriated ice fisherman drilled a hole in the ice and peered into the hole and a loud voice said, "There are no fish down there."
He walked several yards away and drilled another hole and peered into the hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there."
He then walked about 50 yards away and drilled another hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there."
He looked up into the sky and asked, "God, is that you?"
"No, you idiot," the voice said, "it's the rink manager."
What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
Dam.
A lawyer was asked if he likes to become a Jehovah's Witness.
He declined, as he hadn't seen the accident, but replied that he would still be interested in taking the case.
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Computers are like air conditioners.
They work fine until you start opening windows.