Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.
Q: Why does the Iraqi Navy have glass bottom boats?
A: So they can see their Air Force.
Q: What would Martin Luther King be if he was white?
A: Alive.
Vote:
Sex without condoms is magical... A baby appears and father disappears.
A doctor had been attending a rich old man for some time, but it became apparent that the old chap had not long to live.
Accordingly, the doctor advised his wealthy patient to put his affairs in order.
"Oh yes, I've done that," said the old gentleman.
"I've only got to make a will.
And do you know what I'm going to do with all my money?
I'm going to leave it to the doctor who saves my life."
The only exercise I have done this month... is running out of money.
An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: "Anyone knows the formula for water?"
"Sure. That's easy," said one man.
"What is it?"
"H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O."
"What, what?" reasked the instructor.
"H to O," explained the chemistry expert.
Why do black people have nice shoes and nice cars but not nice houses?
Because they haven't figured out how to steal houses yet!
Vote:
My dotor told me: "I've tow news for U; one good and the other one bad, which one do U prefer to hear first?"
I replied I prefer the good one.
Doctor: "U will die after next 24 hours!"
I told: "Then what is the bad newsrnDoctor: "I forgot to tell U yesterday!"
Your momma is so ugly when she gets her beauty sleep she falls into a coma!