Q: What happens when you stick you hand in a jar of jellybeans?
A: The black ones steal your watch.
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So, a gay man goes to church one Sunday.
As the offering basket is passed, he drops in a big wad of bills.
When the basket gets back to the minister, he notices the wad of money and announces: "Someone here was very generous in the offering today. I would like to ask the person who gave this large amount of money to please stand."
The gay man stood up.
The minister continued, "Well, sir, we certainly do appreciate your generosity.
And to show our appreciation, I'm going to let you select your three favorite hymns."
"Okay," the gay man replied, "I'll take him, him and him!"
Q: What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm?
A: "How are we supposed to find an egg in all this sh*t?"
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There is no backspace button on Chuck Norris' keyboard.
Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.
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"Honey, on this Valentine's Day, I want to tell you something... I'm not rich like Jack, I don't have a mansion like Russell, or I don't have a Porsche like Martin, but I do love you and want to marry you."
"Oh, dear... I love you too... but, what was that you said about Martin?"
Q: What is another name for a gynecologist?
A: A private investigator.
A man who wants to murder his wife goes in a pharmacy and asks for cyanide.
"I'm sorry sir, but I can't give you cyanide just like that."
Without a word, the man takes out his wife's photograph and holds it in front of him.
The pharmacist apologizes, "My mistake, I didn't realize you had a prescription."
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Q: Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?
A: Cause it got stuck in a crack.
My New Year's resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year's resolutions.
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Bro, send me some good jokes.
Sorry, now I'm busy with my Girlfriend.
Good One! Send me more.
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