Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
Why do men like masturbation? It's sex with someone they love.
Chuck Norris hates both the player and the game.
Q: Why do we have to be quiet in church? A: Because people are sleeping!
Chuck Norris's sign language is heard around the world.
The sun is the burning remains of the last planet Chuck Norris pillaged.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with strawberry soda? A berry bubbly bunny.
Q: What do you call a black light? A: A mixed person that shines too bright.
Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
What does a bunny use when it goes fishing? A harenet.