Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all-time because Chuck Norris never played.
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Chuck Norris doesent need a postage stamp...
He just tells the letter where to go and it gets there.
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Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security
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If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
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Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
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Tungsten steel was discovered in Chuck Norris' DNA.
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If you write the Death Note on Chuck Norris, the Death Note dies.
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Chuck Norris once saw a video that takes 24 hours to watch...
He saw it 3 times a day.
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The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a crime against humanity.
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Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
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Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime.
Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."
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