Best jokes ever

One day, a blonde's neighbor goes over to her house, sees the blonde crying, and asks her what happened. The blonde said that her mother had passed away. The neighbor made her some coffee and calmed her down a little and then left. The next day the neighbor went back over to the house and found the blonde crying again. She asked her why she was crying this time. "I just got off of the phone with my sister, her mother died too!"
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Yo' Mama is like a blimp: a huge spectacle that's full of gas.
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
Q: What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed? A: Han So-high
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, weed
Yo mama's so old her breast milk is powdered.
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: age, food, insulting, Yo mama
A boss took one of his employees to show his new sports car. "That is amazing" the employee was fascinated. "That is true" replied boss "and if you set your new goals higher and work even harder I can get an even better car next year".
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: life
Two elderly people living in Trailer Estates, he was a Widower and she a widow, had known each other for a number of years. One evening there was a community supper in the big activity center. The two were at the same table, across from one another as the meal went on, he took a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered the courage to ask her, " Will you marry me?" After about six seconds of ' careful consideration' , she answered "Yes. Yes, I will. " The meal ended and, with a few more pleasant exchanges, they went to their respective places. Next morning, he was troubled. "Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?" He couldn't remember. Try as he might, he just could not recall. Not even a faint memory. With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her. First, he explained that he didn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the lovely evening past. As he gained a little more courage, he inquired, "When I asked if you would marry me, did you say 'Yes' or did you say 'No'?" He was delighted to hear her say, "Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart." Then she continued, "I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me."
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: memory, old people, time, wedding
There are three kinds of accountants in the world. Those who can count and those who can't.
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: accountant, math, work
On the way home from a hunt, a hunter stops by the grocery store. "Give me a couple of steaks," he says. "We're out of steaks but we have hot dogs and chicken," says the butcher. "Hotdogs and chicken?!" yells the hunter. "How can I tell my wife I bagged a couple of hotdogs and chickens?"
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, hunting, marriage, mean
Yo mama's so stupid she tried comiting suicide by jumping of a tall building but got lost on the way down.
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: death, stupid, Yo mama
I have to be honest, I am English myself but some of the American jokes on this site just completely ruin it for me. I mean, what the shit happened on the ninth of November anyway?
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has 67.69 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: black humor
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