Best jokes ever

Put a "Please Use Other Door" sign on the entrance to your office building if it only has one entrance.
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: April fools, office
One day in class, the teacher told everyone to turn to a blank sheet of paper in their notebooks. She noticed that Chip, the dumb jock, was having trouble with her directions. "Have you found a blank piece yet, Chip?" said the teacher. "Nope. I haven't," said the dumb jock. "Somebody went through and drew lines across all of the pages."
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: blonde
My New Year's resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year's resolutions.
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: friendship, new year
Three men discuss the Christmas presents they bought for their wives. The first man says that he bought his wife a vacation home in the Bahamas and one in Jamaica. "That way," he explains, "if she doesn't like one, she can use the other." The second man says he had bought his wife a sports car and a limo for exactly the same reason. The third man says, "I bought my wife a negligee and a vibrator. That way, if she doesn't like the negligee, she can go screw herself."
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: money
This guy comes back from the toilet, when a women says to him, "Hey, you have left your GARAGE door open"!" As the man is zipping his fly up, he says with a big smile,"Did you see my big black hummer?" The woman replies, "Nope just a MINI COOPER with two flat tires."
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: women
What do a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? Men always miss them.
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: anniversary, men, sex
Doc, says Steve, "I want to be castrated." "What on Earth for?" "It's something I've been thinking about for a long time. If you don't do it, I'll just go to another doctor." "OK, but it's against my better judgment." Steve has his operation. The next day he walks down the hospital corridor very slowly, legs apart, with his drip stand. Heading toward him is another patient walking exactly the same way. "Hi there," says Steve, "It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me." "Yeah," says the patient, "I finally decided I'd like to be circumcised." Steve's eyes widen in horror, "Oh no! That's the word!"
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: men
"Between a rock and a hard place" refers to Chuck Norris' fists.
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses? A: Bronchitis.
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: cowboy, health, horse, medical
What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an Asian? A car thief that can't drive.
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has 67.89 % from 393 votes. More jokes about: asian, car, mexican, racist
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