Q: Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists? A: The rest are hunting peckers.
Don't get upset if I ask you where something is in Target when you choose to wear a red shirt and khakis to shop.
Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow? You just don't follow him that close!
Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
In the game 'Spore', The Grox are a result of Chuck Norris being allowed to create a species, but they had to be weakened to make the game possible.
Chuck Norris beat Super Mario Galaxie 2 in the big dipper... before Nintendo was invented.
Chuck Norris is the reason Pluto is no longer a planet.
Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.
Q: How many Democrats does it take to clean up a disastrous Bush presidency? A: At least two!