Best jokes ever

Little Johnny asks his father for a $200 bicycle for his birthday. Johnny's father says, "We have an $80,000 mortgage on the house, and I just got laid off! There won't be a $200 bike this year." Two days later, Little Johnny walks out of the house with all his belongings in a suitcase. His father asks him why he's leaving. Johnny says, "Early this morning, I was walking past your room, and I heard you tell Mommy that you were pulling out, and Mommy said that you should wait because she was coming too, and I'll be damned if I'll get stuck with an $80,000 mortgage!"
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has 67.83 % from 147 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Fast way to screw up someone's Knock Knock joke...? "It's open."
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has 67.83 % from 635 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
Whats the difference between usain bolt and hitler? Usain bolt can finish a race...
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has 67.81 % from 329 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Hitler, racist, sport
Q: What is the difference between an ISIS boot camp and a local school? A: How should I know? I just fly the drones.
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has 67.81 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: air force, school, terrorist, war
What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated on him.
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: food, life, time
Q: How did the hail stone describe its life? A: It really has a lot of ups and downs.
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: life, weather
Q: Why did the butcher get fired from his job? A: He was caught beating his meat.
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: food, work
One day Daily Mail has a article with title: "One in four cannot read." The next day one another newspaper writes: "Nice to see a newspaper finally acknowledging their audience."
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: life
I've just discovered a method for making wool out of milk. But doesn't that make the cow feel a little sheepish?
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
In Heaven: The cooks are French, The policemen are English, The mechanics are German, The lovers are Greek, The bankers are Swiss. In Hell: The cooks are English, The policemen are German, The mechanics are French, The lovers are Swiss, The bankers are Greek.
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has 67.80 % from 164 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, heaven, money, racist
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