Best jokes ever

Drake Bell: In honor of Kim and Kanye's baby "North West" I will be naming my first son "Taco".
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: baby, celebrity, life
A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window. A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong, mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep.  The little guy starts to feel a little airsick, but he's afraid to wake the big guy up to ask if he can go to the toilet. He knows he can't climb over him, and so the little guy is sitting there, looking at the big guy, trying to decide what to do. Suddenly, the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable wave of nausea passes through the little guy. He can't hold it in any longer and he pukes all over the big guy's chest. About five minutes later the big guy wakes up, looks down, and sees the vomit all over him. "So," says the little guy, "are you feeling better now?"
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: airplane, disgusting, travel
Scene: A radio newsroom. Caller: "I just wanted to let you know you're off the air." Host: "Yes, we know. The engineers are working on it." Caller: "It would be nice if you put something on the air that says that."
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: communication, technology, work
A man visits his doctor with celery stalks stuck in each ear and a carrot stick up each nostril. He mumbles, "Doc, I'm just not feeling well." The doctor replies, "Maybe you're not eating right."
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: doctor, food, men
Get bad marks, relatives will insult you. Get good marks, friends will insult you.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: family, friendship, insulting, school
Q: How do all stoner stories start? A: This one time when I was high...
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: time, weed
An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman's head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now."
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, couple, disgusting, old people
Q: VWhy didn't the fixed dog cross the road? A: Because he didn't have the balls to do it.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: dog, mean
My 3-year-old granddaughter, Sydney, told my husband, Ted, and me that she was going fishing with her dad. Ted asked if she was going to use worms. "No," she said. "I'm going to use a fishing pole."
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, fish, kids
Your mama's so fat she asked for a water bed and we threw a blanket on the ocean.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, Yo mama
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