Best jokes ever

Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.
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has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: black humor, kids
Programming is like sex One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
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has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: life, programmer, sex
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her vibrator went soft.
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has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
A boyfriend asks his girlfriend: "What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?" "Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it…"
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: men, relationship, time, Valentines day
There is nothing fun about a funeral, but despite that, I had a good laugh at the following reaction by my two children. We, along with a bunch of other relatives, were following the hearse of my late great aunt. When my daughter, who always tends to focus on the morbid things in life raised the dreaded question, "Dad, what's going to happen to us when you die?" My son who was busy texting one of his friends at the time barely glanced up from his phone. "We'll go in the limousine dummy."
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: death, family, funeral, kids, phone
A woman gave her two sons to different families for adoption. One goes to an Egyptian family and called Amal. The second child goes to Spain and is called Juan. Many years later, Juan sends his mother a photo of himself. She turns to her sister saying that she wished that she had a photo of her other son. The sister responded "Hey, they are identical twins. If you have seen Juan, you have seen Amal."
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: black humor, family
Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
It's graduation day, and everybody's going to get their diploma but Josh. At the assembly, the entire senior class stands up and shouts "Let Josh graduate, let Josh graduate!" The principal agrees to give Josh one last chance. "If I have five apples in my right hand and five in my left hand, Josh, how many apples do I have?" he asked. Josh thought long and hard and then said: "Ten." And the entire senior class stood up and shouted, "Give Josh another chance. Give Josh another chance!"
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: graduation, school, student
Q: What game does the brontosaurus like to play with humans? A: Squash.
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, game, sport
Little Johnny comes home from school, and his mom asks: "Johnny, how did it go with your exam? Was written or oral?" And Johnny says: "Mom, I think it was anal... 'Cuz it went like shit!"
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has 66.16 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, school, vulgar
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