Q: Why won't Easter eggs go out at night? A: They don't want to get "beat up".
Chuck Norris caught all the pokemon with a Nokia 3310.
The largest unit of digital information is called Chuckbyte.
When Chuck Norris kills time, that'll be the end of it.
Q: What was the dentist doing in Panama? A: Looking for the Root Canal!
Q: If marriage is terrific what is divorce? A: Ten thousand!
Q: What kind of money do elves use? A: Jingle bills!
One day 2 blondes walked into a tanning salon. One blonde said, " A tan for 2 please!" The cashier said, " Ok," filled out a form for them and asked, "are you two sisters?" They chuckled and replied, " No, we aren't even Catholic."
Phone a friend and tell them you're a doctor, and you're very, very sorry, but you did everything you could to save their... then pretend that the connection dropped out. Wait a couple beats, then give your deepest condolences. Then hang up.
When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.