Best jokes ever

A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened. The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied "I don't know, it all happened so fast."
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why do men like blonde jokes? A: Because they can understand them.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: men
"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!" "Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."
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has 64.86 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: math, phone, relationship, student
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. Steve Martin
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has 64.86 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: car, sex, technology
Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? Bless you.
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has 64.84 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: communication, knock-knock
What has more brains than a dead baby? The wall behind it.
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has 64.83 % from 457 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
Chuck Norris can throw a house through a window.
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has 64.81 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Holy mother, full of grace Bless my boyfriend's gorgeous face Bless his hair that tends to curl Keep him safe from all the girls Bless his arms that are so strong Keep his hands where they belong Bless his dick, the one i sucked Bless the bed, in which we fucked And if my Mom happened to walk in Bless the shit I'd be in.
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has 64.81 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: poems, sex, vulgar
Englishman, Scottish man and Irishman selling bibles door to door, they have a bet who will sell the most in a day. They meet up at end of day and Englishman has sold 2, Scottish man had sold 3, but the Irishman who had a terrible stutter says hhhee hhhee hhhad sssold ssssixty. The other two asked how did he do it. He said, "Wwwhen Iiiii nnnnnnknock aaaat thththe ddddooor I said: Do you wwwwwant tto bbbuy a bbbbbible ooooorrr shshshould Iiii jjjust rrrread it tttto yyyyou?"
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has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: bible, life
Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture. And Won.
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has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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