Q: How did the hail stone describe it's life? A: It really has a lot of ups and downs.
There is no use crying over split milk, unless it's Chuck Norris' milk.
Chuck Norris can read an eye chart with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris watched the first season of "24" in 5 hours.
Kennen was having a drink in a saloon when his neighbor, Stakely, came rushing in. "Ah think somebody's stealin' yore pickup truck!" the man said breathlessly. Kennan ran outside, but came back right away. "Well, did yew stop him?" asked Stakely. "Naw!" said the redneck. "He was too fast. But Ah got his license plate before he got away!"
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Chuck Norris "Caught 'Em All " twice.
When Chuck Norris kills time, that'll be the end of it.
Chuck Norris doesn't take the cake, the cake sees Chuck Norris and begs to be devoured.
The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.