Q: What exercise do Hairdressers do in the gym?
A: Curls.
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Santa have in common?
A: After a night of visiting children, they both have empty sacks.
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Englishman, Scottish man and Irishman selling bibles door to door, they have a bet who will sell the most in a day.
They meet up at end of day and Englishman has sold 2, Scottish man had sold 3, but the Irishman who had a terrible stutter says hhhee hhhee hhhad sssold ssssixty. The other two asked how did he do it.
He said, "Wwwhen Iiiii nnnnnnknock aaaat thththe ddddooor I said: Do you wwwwwant tto bbbuy a bbbbbible ooooorrr shshshould Iiii jjjust rrrread it tttto yyyyou?"
Two husbands were having a conversation,
First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry.
So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
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Only 3 things that are infinite
1.Human Stupidity
2.Universe
3.WinRar Trial
Q: What do you call cheese that's not yours?
A: Nacho cheese!;)
A man goes to see a wizard and says "can you lift a curse that was put on me years ago ?"
"Maybe," says the wizard, "if you can remember the exact words of the curse ?"
The man replies without hesitation "I pronounce you man and wife ..."
Q: How come so black people died during the war?
A: Because when the captain yelled "Get down" they all got up and danced.
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