Lara Rabbit: "Do you think that's Sophie's natural color?" Zara Rabbit: "Only her hare dresser knows for sure."
A drunk sitting at a bar observes a very snobby woman participating in a wine tasting contest. She was very good at identifying the wine. At the first taste she says: "Cabernet Sauvignon, 1998" and all the people were amazed. At the 2nd try she answers "Cabernet Sauvignon, 1953" and they were once again amazed. Then the drunk pisses in a glass and hands it to her. She tries it and says "Yak, this tastes like piss!" And the drunk says, "Yeah, but what year was I born?"
Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
When you insult Chuck Norris, the next thing you are going to see is a bunch of halos.
Chuck Norris can freeze water using a toaster.
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
There was no world recession, just Chuck Norris desiring a discount.
Yo mama is so stupid she married a carpenter just to get nailed.
The following conversation took place in school. Teacher: "So we are all descended from Adam and Eve." Young kid: "My dad says we came from apes." Teacher: "That's probably true for your family Abdul."
What is a "successful hunting trip"? When three men kill 9 cases of Budweiser in two days