Best jokes ever

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: money
Grandma: "Why is that dumb piece of cotton candy talking." Me: "Grandma, thats Nikki Minaj."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
A reporter asked Chris Rock who do you think would win the presidency? He said quickly Obama. When asked why, he replied, has anyone ran a race with a Kenyan and won?
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: life, political
You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, business, insulting
There were these two bums and they were hungry when they came across road kill. The first bum went down to eat it when he looked up at his friend and said, "Oh I'm sorry, would you like some?" He replied, "No I think I'll wait." So they continue down the road and the first bum said, "Look - some more road kill, I'm still hungry. How about you?" His friend replied, "No, not yet, I think I'll wait." The first bum ate the road kill. Shortly after, his eyes rolled back and he puked the whole thing back up on the street. Seconds later, his friend dove in and ate every last slickery drop of the puke. The first bum said, "I thought you weren't hungry?" His friend replied, "I was always hungry, I just wanted a warm meal."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, food
Kid: "please could I go 2 the toilet" teacher: "say the alphabet" Kid: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz" teacher: "where's the p?" kid: "running half way down my leg"
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: kids
Q: Know why skeletons are so calm? A: Because nothing gets under their skin.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: communication, Halloween
Q: What's brown and very bad for your dental health? A: A baseball bat.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: dentist, health, sport
Q: What’s the definition of a pessimist? A: A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: life
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were stuck on an island for many, many years until one day they found a magic lamp. They rubbed it hard and out popped a genie. He said that he could only give three wishes so since there were three girls, each would get one wish. The redhead went first. "I hate it here. It is too hot and boring. I want to go home!" "Okay," replied the genie. And off she went. Then the brunette went. "I miss my family, my friends and relatives. I want to go home, too!" And off she went. The blonde started crying and said, "I wish my friends were back here!"
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde
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