Joke #11425

"I have the body of an athlete." "Better give it back. You're getting it out of shape."
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: athlete

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You're not alone. Sometimes, even Usain Bolt feels like he's running in circles.
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Jack: "What's the name of the fastest dinosaur at the Olympics?" Jill: "I haven't a clue. What?" Jack: "Prontosaurus."
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Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race. One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds." The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record." So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: athlete, time
Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year. In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
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has 48.02 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: athlete, celebrity, ethnic, sport
Oh, you play racquetball? You must be extremely athletic.
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has 43.90 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: athlete, mean, sport
Did you hear about the hopeless athlete? He ran a bath and came in second.
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has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: athlete, time
Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
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has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, athlete
So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.
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has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: athlete, friendship, sport
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get? A: Mistle-toes!
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has 54.98 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: athlete, Christmas, elf
An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, ‘We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middleaged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practising law for 30 years.’ ‘I’ll take the lawyer’s heart,’ says the patient. ‘Why?’ asks the doctor. The patient replies, ‘It’s never been used.’
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has 78.02 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: athlete, business, lawyer