Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.
Q: What do a penis and a Rubik's Cubes have in common? A: The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote? One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny.
The reason why the desert is dry is because Chuck Norris got thirsty.
How should you treat a baby goat? Like a kid.
Chuck Norris blows out trick candles.
Hurricane Katrina wasn't the weather... it was the wind of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick from Texas to Louisiana.
Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
After a really good party a man walks into a bar and orders a drink. Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the person sitting next to him and says, "You wanna hear a blonde joke?" The person replies, "I am 240 pounds, world kickboxing champion and a natural blonde. My friend is 190 pounds, world judo champion and is a natural blonde. And my other friend is 200 pounds, world arm wrestling champion and is also a natural blonde. Do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?" The man thinks for a while and replies, "Not if I have to explain it three times."
Why did the Mexican take Xanax? For hispanic attacks.