Chuck Norris can set magnifying glasses on fire...using ants.
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Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man.
When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
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Once Chuck Norris rubbed a magical lamp, nothing came out.
The genie ain't stupid.
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Chuck Norris' feet are so fast, he can kick you in the past.
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For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one.
For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one
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After meeting with Chuck Norris' lawyer the UFC have changed their name from "Ultimate Fighting Championship" to simply "Fighting Championship."
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When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
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Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.
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Fire trucks and ambulances pull to the shoulder when chuck Norris drives by.
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When Chuck Norris wants salad, he eats a vegetarian.
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If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
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