Best jokes ever

A couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. On the way home, she notices a tear in his eye and asks if he's getting sentimental because they're celebrating 50 wonderful years together. He replies, "No, I was thinking about the time before we got married. Your father threatened me with a shotgun and said he'd have me thrown in jail for 50 years if I didn't marry you. Tomorrow I would've been a free man!"
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More jokes about: anniversary, marriage, old people, prison
Yo' Mama is so old, she dreams in black and white.
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More jokes about: age, insulting, technology, Yo mama
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."
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Yo Momma is so hairy, that Bigfoot tried to take her picture!
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Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1.
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More jokes about: coding, computer, IT, nerd
Q: Why did Humpty Dumpty push his girlfriend on the wall? A: To see her crack.
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More jokes about: black humor
Yo momma is so poor she ran after a trash can truck with her shoping list.
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More jokes about: money, Yo mama
A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do.
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More jokes about: IT
Q: What's the difference between Elvis and a smart Liberal? A: Elvis has been sighted.
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More jokes about: democrat, music, political
Q: What’s the definition of a pessimist? A: A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.
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More jokes about: life