What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house?
The Lizard of Oz.
What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common?
Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth.
How would you get four reindeer in a car?
Two in the front and two in the back.
And how do you get four polar bears in a car?
Take the reindeer out first.
What is the best advice to give a worm?
Sleep late.
As horses say to one another.
Any friend of yours is a palomino!
Once upon a time, Chuck Norris moved a Mack truck out of his way.
We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
Vote:
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
Phone a friend and tell them you're a doctor, and you're very, very sorry, but you did everything you could to save their... then pretend that the connection dropped out.
Wait a couple beats, then give your deepest condolences.
Then hang up.
What do you call it when Miley Cyrus falls down?
Hoe-Down.