I got into an embarrassing situation at a swingers' party last night.
I snuck up behind an older lady, started fucking her from behind then looked up and suddenly realised that the guy at the other end of the spitroast, getting a blowjob, was my dad. I said, "After 30 years of marriage I can't believe you're being unfaithful to mum."
He said, "I'm not."
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Me: "Will you Remember me in a day?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Will you remember me in a week?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Will you remember me in a month?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Will you remember me in a year?"
Her: "Yes."
Me: "Ok, I have a joke.
Her: "Ok."
Me: "Knock, knock."
Her: "Who's there?"
Me: "You didn't remember me."
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I hate Chuck Norris.
Oh SHI...
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Dear Husband,
I have been feeling really dirty lately. Please do me.
Love, Dishes
Q: What do you call a Chinese person with a video camera?
A: Phil Ming
Q: What did the little black kid get for Christmas?
A: My bike.
Vote:
A husband asks his very ill wife at the hospital:
Tell me what is your last wish?
Nothing more, I just want to check my status on Facebook.
Boy: "Do you like parties?"
Girl: "Yes, why?"
Boy: "Well then jump in my pants and have a ball!"
Yo mama's so fat that, after sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Kanga.
Kanga who?
Actually, it's kangaroo!
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