Q: How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?
A: Pick it up and suck it's dick.
Q: Why is a blonde like a turtle?
A: They both get fucked up when they're on their backs.
Yo Momma SO STUPID WHEN THEY SAID THAT IT IS CHILLY OUTSIDE, SHE WENT OUTSIDE WITH A BOWL AND A SPOON.
Yo Momma's so fat, when she goes to Taco Bell, they run for the border!
A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
What is a man's idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.
A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over."
Those children were the dinosaurs.
If you want to drive your wife crazy don’t talk in your sleep, just smile.
Two hookers standing on a street corner started discussing business.
One of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air."
The other hooker looked at her and said, "Sorry No, I just burped."
What rule could stop HIV in Africa?
Sex after dinner only.