Best jokes ever

Lady: Is this my train? Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company. Lady: Don’t try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi. Station Master: No Madam, I’m afraid it’s too heavy.
Vote: has 63.81 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: travel, women
How many Wall Street protesters does it take to change a light bulb? None, they can't change a thing.
Vote: has 63.79 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, light bulb
One day at the Ricki Lake Show, the topic was ghosts. Before the show, she asks the audience: "Who here has ever sensed the presence of a ghost?" and 5 people raise their hand. Then she asks "Who here has ever seen a ghost?" and 3 people raise their hand. Then she asks "Okay, now who here has ever had sex with a ghost?" and 1 person, an old man raises his hand. So she goes up to this old man and says "what was it like?" and he said "Oh…it was great! Never had any like it before!" and she asked "Really? So the ghost was good?" and the old man said "Ghost? I thought you said goat!"
Vote: has 63.75 % from 175 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, sex
Q: What is a banana's favorite gymnastic move? A: The splits!
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, gym, kids, sport
A male driver gets stopped by police, and is asked: "Have you been drinking?" The man replies: "Okay, yes, I have... how did you know officer? Was I swerving across the road, or speeding?" "No sir," replied the policeman, "...nothing else can explain that fat ugly woman sitting next to you."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids
Q: What will a giraffe do, if you spit in its face? A: It will kick off your ladder…
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A Native American walks into a bar with a cat, a bag of sh*t and a shotgun. He asks for a bottle of whiskey and immediately downs it. He throws the bag of sh*t up in the air, shoots it with his shotgun, and takes a big bite of the cat's ass. The bartender asks, "Buddy, what the hell are you doing?" The Native American responds, "I want to be like the white man: get drunk, shoot the sh*t and eat pussy."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol
A little old lady sits at the luncheonette counter and orders a hamburger. The huge guy behind the counter bellows, "One burger!" Whereupon the chef grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it in his bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and then tosses it on the grill. "That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," the old lady says. "Yeah?" says the counterman. "You should be here in the morning when he makes the doughnuts."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
What went through the fly's mind as he hit the windshield? His Butt!
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting