Yo momma is so old that her first Christmas was the first Christmas.
Recently, I've been using the Bible for support.
I've got a wobbly coffee table.
Q: Why was the dirty old man fired from the poultry shop?
A: He couldn't keep his hands off the breasts and thighs.
Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture.
And Won.
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If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.
Q: Whats the difference between a black person and an apple?
A: The apple falls from the tree.
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My girlfriends dad asked me what I do.
Apparently, "your daughter" wasn't the right answer.
I walked into the computer repair place with my broken Macintosh computer.
I looked at the stack of them on the rack and said, ‘What’s that, Broke Mac Mountain?’
What happened when the shark became famous?
He tured into a starfish.