Would you like to hear a construction joke?
[Yes]
Well I'm still working on it.
Q: What happens when four mexican guys are standing in quick sand?
A: Quatro Sinko.
Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie - I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
Yo mama so ugly she made santa say ho ho ho.
Q: What element is a girl's future best friend?
A: Carbon.
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Being a very religious kind of person, when I checked into my hotel, I said to the woman at the desk; "I hope the p*rn channel in my room is disabled."
"No," she said, "It's regular p*rn, you sick b*stard!"
A quiet man, is a thinking man. A quiet woman, is usually mad.
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, "I think I've lost an electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first says, "Yes, I'm positive..."
Son: "What's love juice daddy?"
Me: "It's what 2 people make when they're having exciting sex. Anyway? What are you watching?"
Son: "Wimbledon."
Mommy, mommy, I don't want to visit grandma today!
"Shut up and keep digging, boy."
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