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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares. Actually he can also blow your face.
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Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?  A: After a dye job.
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Chuck Norris can eat peanut butter with a straw.
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Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.
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Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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What kind of sharks make good carpenters? Hammerheads.
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One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
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Chuck Norris once drank wine from a chalice. This chalice is now known as the holy grail.
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Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.
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