Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares. Actually he can also blow your face.
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job.
Chuck Norris can eat peanut butter with a straw.
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.
Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
What kind of sharks make good carpenters? Hammerheads.
One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
Chuck Norris once drank wine from a chalice. This chalice is now known as the holy grail.
Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.