An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch together, so they were driving the fence line to check everything out when they came upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence.
So the Longhorn gets out of the truck, looks around, and then starts screwing the goat.
He gets finished, takes a step back, ands asks the Aggie, "Hey, you want a piece of this?"
The Aggie says, ´"Yeah, but do I have to stick my head in the fence?"
Vote:
Doctor: "Sir, I have some bad news; you have been diagnosed with cancer and Alzheimers."
Old man: "Well, at least I don't have cancer!"
Vote:
Q: If Dan Quayle, Bob Packwood and Bill Clinton participated in a spelling contest, who would win?
A: Dan Quayle. He's the only one who knows that "harass" is one word.
Q: Whats the height of desperation?
A: A vampire sucking blood from a sanitary napkin.
Vote:
Yo Mama's so ugly, I can f**k her in any position and it'll still be doggie-style.
Why don't men like to drink coffee at work?
It keeps them awake.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she put ice down her pants to keep the crabs fresh.
Question: Why does Tigger smell?
Answer: You'd smell too if you played with Pooh all day!
Yo mama so ugly that she saw herself six ways in the mirror!
Q: What's brown and white and flies all over?
A: Thanksgiving turkey, when you carve it with a chainsaw!
Vote: