Right angles used to be called wrong angles until Chuck said, "I don't see anything wrong with them."
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
Chuck Norris wears boots to protect the Earth from his feet.
Obama said, "Yes we can." Chuck Norris says, "I already did.".
Chuck Norris once stared death in the face... Death pissed his pants.
Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
Chuck Norris once had a pet monkey...his name was KING KONG
When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat. The weights do.
Chuck Norris can play a whole note in 3/4 time.