Best jokes ever

Guys, enough with the Asian jokes...they're all the same.
Vote: has 62.37 % from 80 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: asian, racist
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex.
Vote: has 62.36 % from 89 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, sex
Q: You know that awesome feeling, when you finally understand math? A: Me neither.
Vote: has 62.36 % from 86 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the state fair every year. Every year Stumpy would say, "Martha, I'd like to ride in that there airplane." And every year Martha would say, "I know Stumpy, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars." One year Stumpy and Martha went to the fair and Stumpy said, "Martha, I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance." Martha replied, "Stumpy, that there airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars." The pilot overheard them and said, "Folks, I'll make you a deal, I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you, but if you say one word it's ten dollars." Stumpy and Martha agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word was heard. He did all his tricks over again, but still not a word. They landed and the pilot turned to Stumpy, "By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't." Stumpy replied, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."
Vote: has 62.33 % from 395 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, marriage, money, travel, wife
There is a man who goes out drinking all the time and comes home very later every night. So one night his wife decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan, and decides to hide in the dark, and scare him when he gets home. The man comes home, and his wife jumps out and screams in his face. He just looks at her and says, ”You don’t scare me I am married to your sister!”’
Vote: has 62.31 % from 285 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: drunk, marriage, wife
How are Justin Bieber and a Christmas tree similar? Both their balls are decoration only.
Vote: has 62.30 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, music
One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch: "My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
Vote: has 62.30 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, life, math, time, women
A woman got married, but her husband was abusive. She got remarried and that husband ran out on her. She got married again and that husband failed in bed. Finally, she put an ad in the paper: "Looking for a man who won't abuse me, won't leave me, and won't fail me in bed." The next day, the doorbell rings. There is a man with no arms and no legs. "Hello, I saw your ad in the paper," he says. "Tell me a little about you." "Well, I have no arms, so I can't hit you. I have no legs, so I can't run out on you," he replies. "How do I know you're good in bed?" she asks. He says, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
Vote: has 62.26 % from 840 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage
What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, travel
An old lady at the bank asked me if I could help her check her balance. So I pushed her over.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: old people