Chuck Norris can speak Japanese... in French.
Vote:
Apparently 98% of black people enjoy sex in the shower.
The other 2% have never been to prison.
Vote:
Chuck Norris once stared death in the face...
Death pissed his pants.
Vote:
Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?"
"Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?"
The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
Two men are discussing their lives.
One says, "I’m getting married. I’m tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear."
The other one says, "I’m getting divorced for the same reasons."
Wife:"There's trouble with car. It has water in the carburetor."
Husband:"Water in a carburetor? That's ridiculous."
Wife:"I tell you the cas has water in the carburetor."
Husband:"You don't even know what a carburetor is.I'll check it out. Where's the car?"
Wife:"In the pool."
After his divorce Mr. Jones realized that poker isn't the only game that starts with holding hands and ends with a staggering financial loss.
Chuck Norris's urin is said to add 300 horse power when added to your gas.
Vote:
Wife comes out of a beauty salon and asks husband:
"So, how do I look?"
"Well, at least you tried..."
Chuck Norris can freeze water using a toaster.
Vote: