Water holds its breath when Chuck Norris is in below the surface.
Vote:
A little kid's in school, taking a true-false test and he's flipping a coin.
At the end of the test he's flipping the coin again.
The teacher says, "What are you doing?"
He says, "Checking my answers."
Transformers are just another name for Chuck Norris' grade 5 science project.
Vote:
How can you get AIDS from a toilet seat?
By sitting down before the last guy gets up.
An alien walks into a bar and sits next to a drunk guy and begins poking him in the shoulder.
The drunk guy just ignores him.
After a wile the guy turns to the alien and begins looking him up and down.
He notices that the alien has no genitalia.
He then asks "You guys have no genitalia, how do you guy have sex?"
The alien, still poking him in the arm, just smiles!
A man was drowning and asked God to help him.
A boat came by wanting to help the man.
The man refused and said that God would save him.
The man drowned and went to heaven.
He asked God why didn't you save me. God responded, "I sent a boat to get you and you did not get on."
I wish I could see things from your point of view, unfortunately I can't stick my head that far up my ass.
Vote:
What do dinosaurs put on their floors?
Rep-tiles.
I applied for the position of a keeper at the zoo but turns out I was not koalafied.
Yo momma so fat, she fell into a black hole and it clogged!