Why did the blonde go to KFC?
She heard she could get a pair of breasts for $1.99.
How can you tell if a novel is homosexual?
The hero always gets his man in the end.
Girl: We have a mayor. Do you?
Horse: Sure!
Girl: What do you call it?
Horse: Same as you do. Mare!
A businessman hires a private detective to find a missing accountant.
The detective tells him that he needs a description and asks a few questions.
"Was he tall or was he short?"
The businessman replies, "Both!"
Vote:
What's a cow's favorite moosical note?
Beef-flat!
A blonde takes her typewriter to the doctor.
"Doc, I'm afraid my typewriter is pregnant."
The doctor asks, "Why in the world would you think that?"
She says, "Because it's started missing its period."
The longer I stay at home, the more homeless I look.
Too stupid to understand science?
Try religion!
Yo mama is so fat she has to write an apology letter to Japan.
A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat.
He came across two men.
One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter.
The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him.
Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.