Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista, and it has never crashed.
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Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
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Chuck Norris helps little old ladies cross the street...
Bad guys get kicked to the curb!
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he has never cried.
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When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
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Chuck Norris once killed a man in New York while practicing Bruce Lee's one inch punch...
Chuck Norris was in San Franscisco at the time.
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Chuck Norris dosen't need to stand on top of the empire state building to kill someone with a penny.
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Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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My insurance policy says: "Does not cover acts of God, or Chuck Norris."
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Bob the Builder asks if we can fix it, Chuck Norris already did.
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Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard?
He didn't, his beard grew him.
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