Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista, and it has never crashed.
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Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.
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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
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Chuck Norris is cooler than the other side of the pillow.
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Chuck Norris went up Niagra Falls in a barrel.
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Chuck Norris can only text if the phone's touch screen is bullet proof.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
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