Best jokes ever

A husband feeling a bit horny goes to the bathroom and returns with 4 aspirin and a glass of water for his wife. He says, "Here honey, here are some aspirin and a some water." She replied, "but honey I do not have a headache!" He replied, "Thank God!"
Vote:
has 58.60 % from 199 votes. More jokes about: sex
Guy comes up the hill, look up to the sky and yells, "God, I want to hear your opinion! Is Facebook harmful?" And response from heaven, "A moment, I just finish this status.."
Vote:
has 58.59 % from 186 votes. More jokes about: Facebook, god
Q: If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving? A: The cop!
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, driving, weed
You know you're getting old when Santa starts looking younger.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: age, Christmas, Santa
Yo mama teeth are so yellow when she smiles traffic slows down.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: car, insulting, Yo mama
In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, military
The first half of life if ruined by your parents, the second by your kids.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: life
How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: black humor
When I was young I had my first induction day in IT we were making an animation on scratch me and my friend decided to go on our phones. The teacher came over and asked, "what we were doing on our phones." I had to think fast so I said "we were researching something" she said that was alright. Still, to this day I wonder why she didn't notice that we had computers in front of us that had the school wifi.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: phone, school, stupid, teacher, technology
Q: Whats the difference between a box full of dead babies and a cadillac? A: I don't have a cadillac in my garage.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: black humor
<<<674675676677
More jokes →
Page 674 of 1427.