Chuck Norris once stitched up a cut in his arm with a spoon.
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Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
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Anybody can outdo the impossible, but nobody can outdo Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris created the World Wide Web using a typewriter.
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When Chuck Norris decides he wants to kill some time... it's not a figure of speech.
He actually does it.
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Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
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UV rays are caused by Chuck Norris' smiles.
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Chuck Norris will never die.
The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
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They were just five lakes, until Chuck Norris said they were Great!
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Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
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