Best jokes ever

Q: Why do schools in West Virginia only have Drivers Ed two days a week? A: Because they need their cars for Sex Ed the other three days a week!
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has 57.60 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: car, school, sex
What do you get when you cross a brassiere with Texas? Playtex.
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: racist
Yo mama is so dirty when she jumped in the bath water the water jumped out and said "No I'm good."
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, Yo mama
Yo Momma's so stupid that she burned down the house with a CD burner.
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: music, stupid, Yo mama
A little lizard was walking through the forest to see his pal the monkey. The monkey call out hey little buddy come up here I got some great pot. So the little lizard climbed up the tree. The little lizard and the monkey smoked a great big joint. The little lizard said hey this stuff is great but I have horrible cottonmouth. Well there is a river just down there. So the little lizard walk down the tree through the brush and started to drink the water. All of a sudden a crocodile came out of the water. Hey little buddy waz up said the croc, "I just got stoned with my pal the monkey." "Really" said the croc, "where is he I want some." He is through the brush and up the tree. So the croc walked through the brush and to the tree. The monkey said "holy shit how much did you drink little buddy."
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, weed
Yo momma is so old, they use strands of her hair to carbon date dinosaur fossils.
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: age, dinosaur, insulting, science, Yo mama
Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: blonde, sport, stupid
I never thought that the Internet was very useful, but now I've changed my mind. Let's hope your new one works better than the one you had before.
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: geek, internet, IT, technology
A child walks into a whore house with a dead frog on a string trailing behind him. He makes his way up to the counter and says to the person behind such named counter to give him the most diseased woman you have. She looks down at him for a few moments and replies “I’m sorry but I don’t think I can help you….If you would like, we have this young petite thing that could be just what your looking for.” The child puts a 50 dollar bill on the table and repeats “I want the most diseased woman you have.” She looks down at the bill and hesitates but she says to him “I can’t, but we have this nice grandmotherly type for you to cuddle and snuggle up to.” The child looking irritated slams down another 50 dollar bill insisting that she give him the most diseased woman they have. A few moments go by and finally the lady agrees and tells him to go to room 114 and wait a few moments. As he goes up the stairs the dead frog on a string follows right behind him, hitting every step on the way. Half an hour go by and the child comes down the stairs with the dead frog trailing behind. As he is just about to step out the door and back outside the woman behind the counter stops him. “Excuse me, but I have on question before you go…what is the dead frog for? Turning around the child has a look of pure sencerity as he begins to explain. “I wanted the disease so I could give it to my sister, who would give it to my dad, who would give it to my mom, who would give it to the mail man…And that’s the Son of a Bitch who ran over my pet frog.”
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, health, kids
Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill. It took forever to get to the top. When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "Whew, that was so hard." The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards."
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has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: sport
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