Best jokes ever

Q: What's the best way to talk to a velociraptor? A: Long distance!
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has 56.50 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: communication, death, dinosaur
In some quarters, bookstores may be considered dinosaurs, but odd customers are evergreen, as these requests to bookstore clerks prove. "Can you tell me who the author of Shakespeare is?" "I'm looking for a book, but I only know the title, not the author. It's called Dante's Inferno." "I definitely don't want nonfiction. I like autobiographies and history." "Do you have Shakespeare in English?"
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has 56.50 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: business, communication, customer service, dinosaur, stupid
A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, "Children, I'd like you to close your eyes and taste these." The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped. I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something your mommy probably calls your daddy all the time." Instantly, Little Johnny coughed his onto the floor and shouted, "Quick! Spit'em out! They're assholes!"
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has 56.46 % from 7417 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Three policemen are sitting in a car. Bored, as cards and domino make them sick already. On thinks of an idea: Guys, lets play golf. All we need is a stick, ball and a hole. I can arrange a stick, – one says. I will get a ball, - adds another. Guys, I’m not playing this dirty game, - says the third one.
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has 56.46 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What do you call a white guy with 5 black friends? A: Coach!
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has 56.46 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: racist
Q: What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? A: They both have balls just for decoration.
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has 56.42 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, priest
Why is life like a box of fruit? Because when they go bad, they go black!
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has 56.42 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: racist
Q: What do a woman and a bar have in common? A: Liquor in the front, Poker in the back.
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has 56.42 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, game, sex, women
Q: What's the best thing about a blowjob from an Ethiopian? A: You know they'll swallow.
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has 56.42 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: racist
A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly. Suddenly, Lorraine died. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."
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has 56.42 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, funeral, music
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