A policeman spots a woman driving and knitting at the same time.
Driving up beside her, he shouts out the window, "Pull over!"
"No," she shouts back, "a pair of socks!"
In space Chuck Norris can hear your screams.
Vote:
Doctor: "What seems to be your trouble?"
Patient: "When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour."
Doctor: "Try getting up one hour later."
Water can't breath under Chuck Norris.
Vote:
No chicken dies a virgin.
They get laid at birth *slaps knee*.
Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working?
A: Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No.
Your mama so fat when she goes in Walmart and goes out it's gone.
Yo mama so fat, when she went to a subway she mistook the train for a sandwich and ate it.
Yo mama so fat that she could use a bra as a parachute
Yo mama so fat people used her as a tramp.