One day Mullah was beating his donkey in a remote place. A man saw him and asked: why are you beating the poor animal. Sorry, said Mullah, is it a member of your family?
When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do.
Teacher: To which family does the elephant belong? Pupil: I don’t know, nobody I know owns one!
What happened when the shark became famous? He tured into a starfish.
Q: Why is divorce so costly? A: Because its justified, despite all the trouble.
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures.
Yo mama so fat even Donald Trump can't make as big of a wall as her.
What do you spell if you rearrange the letters in Chuck Norris's name. Nothing, because you can't mess with Chuck Norris.
If I wanted some comeback, I'd wipe it off your chin!
A 90 year old women goes to the doctor. Dr i can't stop farting, sure they don't smell and make no noise but still i can't take it any more. Well take these pills every day and come back in a week. Dr what did you do to me not only am i still farting now they smell as well! Oh very well , now about your hearing...