Best jokes ever

There appeared suddenly a crowd of many people in the street, because they caught a thief, who has stolen 500 euros from the grocery. They wanted to beat him up, but Johny stayed still and told the people: "who is without guilt, may throw a stone at this thief!" Nobody wanted to throw a stone at this thief, becuase nobody was without guilt. Suddenly one stone has hit this thief directly into his forehead and he has fallen down to the ground. Johny asked: "who was it? Who was it?" The Heaven has opened and the oldest archangel has s aid: "it was me!"
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: heaven, life, mean, money
Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up? Because the first thing a child looks up is dog. The second is snake. And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, lawyer
Why wasn't Jesus born in Tennessee? They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin...
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: god, life
The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: Why do blondes need see through lunch boxes A: So they can tell if they're coming home or going to work.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How many students does it take to change a light bulb? "Is it worth any bonus marks?"
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: school
After years of scrimping and saving, a husband told his wife the good news: "Honey, we've finally got enough money to buy what we started saving for in 1979." "You mean a brand-new Cadillac?" she asked eagerly. "No," said the husband, "a 1979 Cadillac."
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: husband, money, wife
These two hunters went moose hunting every year without success. Finally they came up with a foolproof plan. (emphasis on fool) They got themselves a very authentic cow moose costume and learned the mating call of a cow moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure in the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot the bull. So, they set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, in their costume, and began to give the moose love call. Before too long their call was answered by bull in the forest. They called again, the bull answered closer to them. They called again, The bull answered, and came crashing out of the forest and into the clearing. As the bulls' pounding hoof beats got closer the guy in front said, "OK, lets get out and get him"! After a moment, that seemed like an eternity, the guy in the back shouts - "THE ZIPPER IS STUCK, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!?!" The front guy says, "Well, I'm gonna start nibbling grass, but you better start to "brace yourself!"
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: sport
Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She passes a person who asks "Where did you get that?" A: The pig says, "I won her in a raffle!"
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Yo momma is so fat that when she went to the beach a whale swam up and sang, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me."
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
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