Q: What do you call a programmer from Finland?
A: Nerdic.
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Two blondes were running from the cops as they had just been caught sneeking over the border into Mexico.
They dashed up to a fence and climbed over it, lights and sirens running behind them.
As they arrived on the other side, they came face to face with a long river.
One blonde said to the other. "Here I'll shine this flashlight over the water and you can walk accross the beam of light."
The other said: "What do you think I am, stupid!? I'll get halfway accross and you'll turn it off!"
Why is it called PMS? — Because “Mad Cow Disease” was already taken.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books.
He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
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Yo' Mama is so ugly, when she was born, her mama called her a treasure, so her daddy offered to bury her.
Your mama is so thin she stepped on a scale and a scale said no papers plz.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, her flyswatter doubles as a spatula.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, Red Lobster kicked her out for bringing her own crabs.
Yo mama so stupid that when she turned on airplane mode...
She thought she could fly.
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What has 4 legs and one arm?
A Doberman in a children’s playground!
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